Wednesday, 04 January 2017 15:27

Finding the Collateral Beauty

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After seeing the previews months ago, we were excited about the new movie, Collateral Beauty.  The previews spoke to us, about grief, about the death of a child and a grieving father.  The previews showed a grieving man writing letters to Love, Time and Death.  We became even more excited.  We expected this movie to be profound and we were not disappointed.

This movie has layers, not unlike the layers of an onion.  How deep do you want to go?  On the surface, while a man grieving the transition of his daughter for more than two years continues to struggle, his business partners acting on behalf of their own self-interests hire actors to play Love, Time and Death, to basically make the grieving man look incompetent.  If this is as deep as you can go, you will hate the movie, but the movie goes much, much deeper than this.

As a fellow grieving parent, we appreciate the movie because it shares how tough it is after a child transitions.  As somebody whose son visited us from the other side, we can understand completely that the actors hired to portray Love, Time and Death where actually ethereal!  And as a member of this esteemed group called Helping Parents Heal, we understand Collateral Beauty all too well because after Quinton “died”, he started visiting us and sending us the most beautiful signs – all of which so moved us that we are here to help as many as we can.

As the movie progresses, we discover that the partners are in various stages of their own grief, (grieving the loss of love, the loss of health, and the loss of family) and are not dealing with it.  And within this whole dance called life, in a way they are actually helping each other, as are we.  Here lies some of the magic of the movie; regardless of specifics or motives, on some level, we are helping each other.

As for the story line, I was surprised as anyone else who saw it through.  I suspected something when Love said, “Shed your skin, begin your life” early in the movie, but it was fleeting.  I resonated with the main character saying “I am trying to fix my mind”, and then the grief group leader indicating that there is no fixing your mind, you lost a child.  I for one, understand that all too well as the things I once thought important are not, no matter how hard I try to make them important.  Now different things are important.  Yes, this is a completely new normal.

The story line and plot, maybe as our lives are too, is the vehicle to learn and grow.  The dialogue from Love, Time and Death to the main character and his partners is profound. “Don’t waste the time you have” – from Time; “You think you can live without me” – Love; “Heal your relationship with your daughter and you will see me again” – Love.  There are many more examples of profound dialogue in this movie that impacts us all, speaking for myself – this depends upon how many times I choose to see the movie.  It will be many.

The tears flowed as I realized the significance of the dominos.  I gasped out loud when I realized the relationship of some of the characters.  And I smiled when the bow was applied to the movie at the very end.  I recommend this movie to anyone who knows loss and who might be open to a broader view of our time here.

It matters not how or when we get it; it just matters that we do.

Blessings!

Read 786 times Last modified on Wednesday, 14 March 2018 14:22

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